No Fun In Nursing Homes

Ethel was a bit of a demon in her wheelchair, charging around the nursing home, taking corners on two wheels, and reaching maximum speeds on the long corridors.
Because the poor woman was a few bricks shy of a full load the other residents tolerated her, and some of the male residents even joined in.

One day, Ethel was flying down one corridor when a door opened and out stepped kooky Clarence with his hand in the air, STOP" he ordered. Do you have a license to drive that thing? Ethel fished around in her pocket, pulled out a candy wrapper and held it up for him to see "OK" he said, and away Ethel went down the hall at top speed.

Rounding the corner by the lunchroom weird Willy jumped out yelling, "STOP"...... Do you have proof of insurance? Ethel searched her other pocket and pulled out a drink coaster, and held it up for Willy to see. Very well. Willy nodded carry on ma'am.

As Ethel rounded the last corner headed for the front door, Crazy Dale stepped out in front of her wearing nothing but a huge erection. Damn cried Ethel "not the Breathalyzer again"