10 Memorable Thoughts

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible. George Burns

Santa Claus has the right idea Visit people only once a year. Victor Borge

What would men be without women? Scarce, sir .. mighty scarce. Mark Twain

By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, youll become happy; if you get a bad one, youll become a philosopher. Socrates

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. Groucho Marx

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. Jimmy Durante

The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness and kindness, can be trained to do most things. Jilly Cooper

I have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back. Zsa Gabor

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat. Alex Levine

Dont go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first. Mark Twain